Dear Sir ....... (or Madam)....

[GrannyJen]

Don't you just love it when in the middle of a most depressing crisis you get junk emails, normally starting with the above, that goes on to describe some wondrous experience you may be missing out on ...

I have just received this one .....

"Dear Jennifer, are you looking forward to a holiday?"....

No, no of course not. I love sitting here, cooped up, looking at the nice sunny weather, gazing wistfully at my Alfie who has barely turned a wheel since March, thinking about all those lovely campsite bookings I was just so thrilled and delighted to cancel 10 weeks ago ..... Holiday? Goodness, perish the thought, whatever made you think I would look forward to getting away .........

Now, where's my knitting .... and oh! My wine, still in the bottle, soon change that ........

 

[Georgiegirl]

I got the dreaded telephone call yesterday from the ‘I understand you were recently in a car accident that wasn’t your fault’ people. I almost said ‘chance would be a fine thing!’

 

[Jay gas]

I have unfortunately received those been in an accident calls. I take great pleasure in telling them how George was involved in a hit and run and go to tell them how the medical bills for George were really quite expensive and just couldn’t understand why the motorist didn’t stop. I make sure to take as long as possible explaining this to the person making the unsolicited phone call to me to waste as much of their time as possible.

George was 6 at the time of the accident and he’s my cat. He recovered really well after being hit by the car then being beaten up by a couple of the local moggy mafia but he does have a bit of a bent old spider monkey tail now.

George is now grounded and doesn’t go further then the gate at the end of our path