Will a campervan change your life?

[2into1]

Not mine, but so funny I had to share this...... The 5th paragraph killed me!

THE purchase of a camper van will not make your life meaningful or free, it has emerged.

As the weather begins to improve, millions of desperate office workers are thinking heavily-romanticised thoughts about buying a vehicle with an uncomfortable bed and a potty in it.

Sales manager Tom Logan said: “I’m going to buy a Jamie Oliver van, put a surf board on the top and drive around Cornwall with a terrier with one of those little hankies round his neck. I will definitely pick up an attractive female hitch-hiker in a battered straw hat and have consensual sex with her.

“Then we’ll look at the sunset and think deep thoughts while feeling truly alive.”

However VW Camper owner Roy Hobbs said: “Mine’s just sitting in the drive, rusting. I’ll take it out next week so that it can go and fail its MOT.

“Basically I’ve slept in it four nights, which means as a form of accommodation it is slightly more expensive than the Savoy.

“I have had no additional sex since buying it, or noticed any increase in my personal liberty or freewheelingness.”

Vintage camper owner Nikki Hollis said: “Apparently ‘freedom’ means ‘travelling slowly in considerable discomfort while using shitloads of petrol’.

“Although I suppose in normal, conventional life you don’t get to cook sausages on a faulty gas ring while crouched next to a plastic box containing human faeces.”

 

[Trailertrash]

Not mine, but so funny I had to share this...... The 5th paragraph killed me!

THE purchase of a camper van will not make your life meaningful or free, it has emerged.

As the weather begins to improve, millions of desperate office workers are thinking heavily-romanticised thoughts about buying a vehicle with an uncomfortable bed and a potty in it.

Sales manager Tom Logan said: “I’m going to buy a Jamie Oliver van, put a surf board on the top and drive around Cornwall with a terrier with one of those little hankies round his neck. I will definitely pick up an attractive female hitch-hiker in a battered straw hat and have consensual sex with her.

“Then we’ll look at the sunset and think deep thoughts while feeling truly alive.”

However VW Camper owner Roy Hobbs said: “Mine’s just sitting in the drive, rusting. I’ll take it out next week so that it can go and fail its MOT.

“Basically I’ve slept in it four nights, which means as a form of accommodation it is slightly more expensive than the Savoy.

“I have had no additional sex since buying it, or noticed any increase in my personal liberty or freewheelingness.”

Vintage camper owner Nikki Hollis said: “Apparently ‘freedom’ means ‘travelling slowly in considerable discomfort while using shitloads of petrol’.

“Although I suppose in normal, conventional life you don’t get to cook sausages on a faulty gas ring while crouched next to a plastic box containing human faeces.”

Sorry to wax philosophical but at 64 I can say without a shadow of a doubt that the only thing which will change your life is YOU! If you wait for other people or things to change your life you will wait forever. If you are hoping that a lottery win or a Brexit or Donald Trump or some deity or anything else will change your life then wish on! Be very careful what you wish for; You might just get it.

 

[Hotel California]

It's that time of the year again...?

 

[johnyboy]

daily mash or daily poke run this a lot made me chuckle

 

[Jez]

Maybe it's a good idea that this sort of article puts people off, lets us who do enjoy those times have them all to ourselves, back in the day my LT 21 gave me some great weekends! Have to agree not toilet is the best option ever!

 

[Borris]

Not mine, but so funny I had to share this...... The 5th paragraph killed me!

THE purchase of a camper van will not make your life meaningful or free, it has emerged.

As the weather begins to improve, millions of desperate office workers are thinking heavily-romanticised thoughts about buying a vehicle with an uncomfortable bed and a potty in it.

Sales manager Tom Logan said: “I’m going to buy a Jamie Oliver van, put a surf board on the top and drive around Cornwall with a terrier with one of those little hankies round his neck. I will definitely pick up an attractive female hitch-hiker in a battered straw hat and have consensual sex with her.

“Then we’ll look at the sunset and think deep thoughts while feeling truly alive.”

However VW Camper owner Roy Hobbs said: “Mine’s just sitting in the drive, rusting. I’ll take it out next week so that it can go and fail its MOT.

“Basically I’ve slept in it four nights, which means as a form of accommodation it is slightly more expensive than the Savoy.

“I have had no additional sex since buying it, or noticed any increase in my personal liberty or freewheelingness.”

Vintage camper owner Nikki Hollis said: “Apparently ‘freedom’ means ‘travelling slowly in considerable discomfort while using shitloads of petrol’.

“Although I suppose in normal, conventional life you don’t get to cook sausages on a faulty gas ring while crouched next to a plastic box containing human faeces.”

Could this be the reason why so many accidentally catch fire?

 

[Velma's Dad]

Mrs VD concedes I've reached Freewheeling Hippy cadet level as I have a "Peace.Love.Dub." sticker on the back of Velma. However she is withholding sex until I get some of those paper flower chains to hang from the screen mirror.

And find some unicorn steaks for the barbie, apparently.

 

[SimonB]

Yes I think the Cali has changed our lives. We both retired and bought the Cali a few months afterwards. We can now look for a break in the weather and just go off for long weekends without having to book B&Bs in advance.

I can use it to go up to Snowdonia to work on the railway from Porthmadog all the year round, thanks to the superb heater.
We have met so many nice people at the meets we have been to and made some great friends too.

I think my biggest problem is not looking smug when people ask how retirement is going. We are loving the Cali lifestyle.

 

[sapto]

Yes, it changed or more transformed but as @Trailertrash said most important is that you change. The van can help to fullfill your dreams and gives your wishes a boost. I like!

 

[Wind Witch]

Husband now definitely into "freewheeling" as he uses the coast function regularly, gleefully pointing out how far he is driving "without using any fuel".

Wouldn't say it's change our lives BUT it has given us something to look forward to at the weekend as we toil away at work during the week

 

[marshian70]

Certainly changed my bank balance!

 

[motacyclist]

Certainly changed my bank balance!

It's only in a sort of a deposit account though!

 

[Velma's Dad]

We can now look for a break in the weather and just go off for long weekends without having to book B&Bs in advance.

Yes that's what we like best about Cali'ing. And actually, who even needs a break in the weather? (We're off first thing tomorrow for a long w/e, first to SW Scotland then maybe the Yorkshire Dales but who knows.)